Eve's Times is happy to announce that Family Therapist and Parent-Teacher educator Brinda Jayaraman will answer any query you want to ask relating to interpersonal interactions. Send in your questions to askbrinda@evestimesonline.com or send to our office directly.

I am a teenaged girl studying in school. My problem is that we have a family as friends that has a teenage boy in college. Whenever there are occasions for us to meet, the boy tries to be very close to me and on a couple of occasions, he tried to be physically intimate to me, much against my wishes. I am afraid that if I tell this to anybody, the friendship of our family will be ruined. I tried telling this boy, but he is very casual about it and keeps saying that all this is part of fun. In fact he openly boasts about his sexual exploits to me when we are alone.   He doesn't show any signs of changing his attitude towards me. In fact, he has a habit of touching all young girls he interacts with and his parents are taking this as normal! If I tell my mother, she will definitely go and ask his parents. On earlier occasions, because of her frank disclosures, we have distanced a few relatives. I   am not close to my father and cannot tell him. How to stop this boy? Should I not attend any family functions and ceremonies?

These kinds of behaviour are observed in many teenage boys and few girls, because the feelings associated with sex are new to them and they are curious to explore new experiences. Like addiction, the first experience is very exciting, which lures them to repeat it! You seem helpless; you will have to figure out a way to self-help. Here is a challenge for you, facing which is going to equip you with skills to deal with similar confrontations in future. Handle it yourself, without telling your mother. Although you ask him not to touch you, you may be physically aroused by his touch, because whatever happens to him is happening to you too involuntarily!! You are unable to stop him. Next time when you both are close to each other, just keep a distance when he gets closer, and push his hand away, if it falls on you. I am asking you to protest by your body language, without talking anything. If that does not help, tell him firmly that you will have to talk to his mother, if he does not stop this behaviour and do tell her courageously. But take care not to put him down when you talk to her. You can only say that you are very uncomfortable by his actions. I appreciate your efforts to keep out of this.