Twelfth-grade began, and suddenly, things weren't the same again. The merriment mellowed down, and people were infused with ambition. Some were still scarred from the incident (which I mentioned last fortnight, about the death of our friend); some even sardonic about the whole thing, but there was a very flimsy thread that held everyone together. Suddenly, that flimsy thread broke.
Meaningful friendships turned into superficial hi-byes, people had fall-outs, there were ego-clashes, people were out to get each others backs. There was fierce competition among a few. They wanted to do well, even if it meant stepping on other peoples' toes. A couple of them slacked away, and indulged in various other activities that kept them happy. Hearts were broken. Friendships seemed to have acquired a very empty meaning to it. Superficiality continued to prevail. I was lost in a sea of people, who suddenly seemed to be very different. Or maybe, I was very different from the rest. I sought solace in studying and books, and decided to keep to myself. I didn't want to play the game that everyone else was playing. I had too much to lose and nearly nothing to gain.
These new friendships that replaced the meaningful ones, had no foundation, and were built on sipping frappes in coffee pubs and discussing other people and spreading rumors. Suddenly, school didn't seem like the home it had once seemed like. It was more of an obligation to go to school. I sat in the front bench and was glued to my seat almost always. I often skipped lunch, and when I was exceptionally hungry, I ate lunch hunching over the Accounts book. I loathed studying, but I had nothing else to do.
I refused to let myself get drowned in the sea that everyone else was swimming in. I was happy being the loner I never was, keeping to myself and offering a smile and comforting words to anyone who needed it. I started counting the days for school to end. I had been happier before. The whole year carried a lot of bitter memories, and a ton of loneliness that I had made myself get accustomed to. Friends were only the people I did Accounts with and discussed school subjects with. I never really could bring myself to discuss movies, people of the opposite sex, music, food, and the like. Everything seemed so immaterial, so artificial. There was something more I had in mind, something special. Someone whom I could share my dreams and thoughts with. But that never happened, and at one point, I was too engulfed in solitude and had grown to enjoy the company of myself. And then suddenly, the exams came and went. School ended as soon as it had begun.
I felt a sense of loss as I took off my uniform for the last time, knowing that I would never wear it again. That was when it hit me that I had to attribute my whole being to my school. I entered ninth-grade as someone shy, scared and wanting to please people. But then school taught me that one cannot please everyone, and that one cannot rely on anyone else for support. One should establish their own standard of principles and abide by them, irrespective of what other people say. One needs to stand up for what they believe in and take things in their stride.
And I exited the school, thinking that I would next visit this place as an ex-student, but I'll always carry with me the memories of this school. It is, after all, the place where I grew to become the person I am.
The months of spring have slowly drifted away, and have been replaced by the scorching heat and the never-ending tepidness and muggy weather. It will be another five months before we encounter those pleasant zephyrs and inhale the redolence of fresh mud and feel raindrops splashing on our palms.
Spring has, however, carried away with it, those dreaded examination blues. Months of turmoil, hard-work, late-night conversations and pouring over fat textbooks have been replaced by long hours of TV, hanging out at the mall, sipping frappes at niche coffee pubs, and scoring the cinemas for the latest movies. That’s the Chennai youth for you.
The sweltering heat and the impossibly torrid temperature is not going to stop anyone from hitting outside clad in the most fashionable clothes, complete with a swanky handbag, accessories and stilettos, cell-phone pressed to one ear and the other hand meticulously applying lip-gloss.
However, the youth have planned to spend the weekend at home with family, being Tamil New Year. While the shops are packed with excited people trying out traditional clothes and investing in flamboyant accessories, this Tamil New Year is certainly going to be celebrated with hype. Even the markets and grocery stores seem to be buzzing with ladies as they pick out ingredients to make delicacies for the occasion. Even though there is an entire story behind ‘Tamil New Year’s Day’, today, it is used as an occasion for family-bonding, and yes, there is no better time to cozy up with family than Tamil New Year’s Day!
For those of you who’ve got plans with friends for that day, cancel out on them and spend the day with your close family and loved ones. There is, after all, nothing to replace your family.
School goers must be neck deep in their preparation for examinations. College goers must be getting somewhere there. For us youngsters, life’s now a whirlwind… of books, lessons, exams, not to mention some of us who have our parents and teachers breathing down our necks… and the inner turmoil that is now becoming a constant phenomenon… the churning of our stomach, its somersaults and grumbling becoming worse as we plod through each day.
Life resembles a journey through the eerie tunnels of the Pyramids….. of course we develop our own addictions during this time… Mine fortunately ended with tea- minimum number of mugs a day, just about enough to keep the eyelids open. Of course… crisp biscuits go with hot tea…. A luxury I am going to allow myself during the dreary days of examinations…. I am indeed conscious that I may have to work out all the extra calories going into the system… but then who cares? These little munchies will help us touch the nineties and eighties; otherwise the danger of sliding down to single digits looms large before our eyes. The tantalizing double digit numbers can fetch us a lot in life….. earn us the respect of our teachers… get a lot of goodies from our parents, and admiring glances from our peers and friends. Worth all the sweat and blood, right?
I believe in a simple mantra …. anything that has begun has to come to an end. That’s the hope that keeps us all going. And the gloriouspossibilities of indulging ourselves after the dint of slogging. Colourful pictures of all that we can do after the exams keep popping out every now and then and spur me on to move forward. I am sure all that I have described just now are common youth experiences. Much as we may detest, no youth can escape nor overlook such examination experiences. Best of luck to you guys and gals who have set out to conquer the world!
It’s great that we are celebrating International Women’s Day. Most of us know why it is being celebrated world over. But to make it more meaningful and close to our hearts, we can do something…. Make a difference in the lives of many innocent, poor girls who need to be helped out from the confines of their humble homes.
Let us thank our fortunes for being born into families that could afford to send us to school and college, give us exposure in various areas and also encourage us to take on activities that we like. The youth, especially the girls, should take up a little activity along with other interests that we pursue and try to do something for our unfortunate sisters. For e.g. we can begin by teaching poor girls living in the vicinity of our homes. We can help poor little school girls with their grammar, math and science. We must also motivate our domestic help and other indigent people we come across in our life to educate their daughters and treat them on par with their sons.
Girls and boys in schools and colleges can also collect funds... like it is done in the US… and donate to organizations that educate the girl child. In some schools in the US children go around with piggy banks and request people to put in their small change for a social cause. I am sure we can also do this, especially during our national festivals and occasions like International Women’s Day. We can also help little girls by buying them uniforms and books by setting apart a small portion of our pocket money, (we can cut down on expenses on recharge cards and fast foods.) I am sure many of us would not mind sacrificing a pizza if it can help light up the life of a little girl. In our own small way, we can think of ideas to help unfortunate little girls languishing in darkness and hunger. On this International Women’s Day, let us all take a pledge to help the Girl Child. We would indeed like to see our contemporaries as educated and balanced individuals in the future, don’t we?
Women are at last becoming person first and wives second, and that is as it should be.
Women have become so highly educated that nothing should surprise them except happy marriage.
